My Love...

grows stronger everyday. <3 <3 <3

Prioritizing

Lately my priorities have been a little shaky. So I'm here to sort them out the best I can.

This summer I was dedicated to Neal Caffrey but once school started again we figured it was best for us to take a break. It also seemed like a good time to take a break from Hank Lawson and his brother Evan. It was just too much to handle and needed to focus on school again. This September however, Jennifer introduced me to Dexter Morgan (we really hit it off) and we were happy for about a month or so. But during that same month Tia and Cristina introduced me to Sano Izumi and he became my new priority. But again that only lasted for so long. I mean it was hard enough trying to juggle Sano and Dexter and ultimately Dexter was the one who lost out. Then things took an ever greater turn when the Twins introduced me to Stephan and Damon Salvatore. (At this point, Dexter took a temporary backseat and Sano was out of my life for good) Stephan and Damon had an effect on my life like no other. For months those boys were all I talked about, all I thought about, all I cared about. But even the most intense relationships come to an end (or I suppose a break) and earlier this month, I decided to take a break from Stephen and Damon (or they decided to take a break from me) And to top it all off, Athavi and Mai brought Rui and Domyouji back into my life as well. (I hadn't seen them since last year and even then we had been on and off for a while)

So at this point it would seem that I'm a free woman without anything holding me down. WRONG. Last night Dexter and I got back together. (I don't know how I survived these last few months without him) However, here's the thing. This coming January, Neal will be back in the picture. We decided on a break that would only last as long as the semester did (but I also had this same agreement with Hank and Evan) And even worse Stephen and Damon will be back in my life near the end of January as well. I'm also planning on seeing Rui and Domyouji again even if it's only once a week (if I'm lucky)

So all in all, I need to sort out my priorities. But there is one person who I think has suffered the most throughout this whole ordeal. He's always been there for me and has always made me smile. He's strong and confident and really knows who he wants to be. This man is Taylor and I have been neglecting my one true love. My soul mate. I am so sorry Taylor for all the pain I have caused you through these last few months. But here's the thing: You are the only one for me. No matter how many people come into my life, you will always be there making me smile. I love you and I am truly sorry for the way I've been treating you. Please forgive me my love. <3

Well I still don't know what to do about these other guys but hey at least I have one priority sorted out. :D

Optimistic

In case you're feeling pessimistic for any reason, here's a little something to cheer you up.

http://hitrecordjoe.tumblr.com/post/2458286167/optimistic-by-cameron-smith-i-know-it-isnt

(And yes Joseph Gordon-Levitt did tell me to watch this via Twitter) :D

P.S. Merry Christmas!

Hold My Hand

This love don't last forever (hold my hand)
So tell me what we're waiting for (hold my hand)
Better off being together (hold my hand)
Then being miserable alone

Cause I've been there before and you've been there before
But together we can be alright
Cuz when it gets dark and when it gets cold
we hold each other till the sunlight

So if you just hold my hand
Baby I promise that I'll do all I can
Things will get better
If you just hold my hand
Nothing can come between us
If you just hold my hand

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

PUPPIES!

I've never felt so complete. :D

"Adopt a pet, for he can become more of our savior then his".

I Could Get Used to This

Yeah, that's right. I had another amazing dream last night!!

And you'll never guess who it was about so I'll just go ahead and tell you. It was about the one, the only, IAN SOMERHALDER!! :D :D :D :D

So in the dream I was at his house (I think the twins were there too) and there was a bunch of people there just chatting it up and stuff. I'm laying on some cushion like (maybe an air mattress, not really sure now) talking to some peeps who I think were the twins. And suddenly Ian Somerhalder is laying RIGHT NEXT TO ME!!! AHHHHH! It seemed as though he was getting overwhelmed by all the people and had to get away from them for a while. So anyways we are like actually touching! Like my knee is leaning against his stomach (which I'm sure some rock hard abs are hiding) and I jokingly say to him "You can stay here if you want. I don't mind". I looked at him and he just smiles at what I said. :D :D :D :D

His smile was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen!! AHH!

Yeah, this guy! :D



oh and later in the dream I go into the backyard and there are all these black labs out there! AW! They made me think of Roxy and it just made the dream even better!!

NGPOS!

Dear Liz Waters Job,

Here's a big FUCK YOU!! I hope you enjoy that! Fucker.

Sincerely,

Katie.


Wondering about the title? (No Good Piece Of Shit)

Here's goes nothing

I know who I want my husband to be. And not in the sense that I know what kind of man I want to marry (quality wise I mean). I physically know who I want to marry.

Yeah I totally know. :D

Pedo Bear

So I had another interesting dream last night. This one however was a little strange and you will soon understand why.

It was about Justin Bieber. That's right JB. So he and I were sitting across from each other out in the yard of some house or something and we were chatting. But here's the thing, you know how I dream about these sexy men like Taylor and Cam? And you know how in those dreams I'm their best friends? Well not in this case. In this dream I happen to be flirting with Justin (I even asked him to call me sometime!) That's right, I happen to flirt with the one dude in my dreams who is under age. Gosh, he's 17! I mean why could I not have flirted with the almost 19 year old or the 28 year old (holy cow he's 28!)? I guess I really don't have the answer to that question. (I think this may have been for the fact that I had a Justin Bieber song stuck in my head and we singing it to myself before I went to sleep, but yeah we'll just go with that.)

I wonder what this say about me. haha.

A Better Day

I know there's sunshine beyond that rain.
I know there's good times beyond that pain.

I close my eyes and I can see a better day.

Gotta Love It

I am just having tons of luck with dreams these days! Gosh, this is the life or I guess this is the dream. Haha. Anyways, I shall share with you this lovely dream that I had last night. :D

I know what you're thinking, it was another dream about Taylor but alas it wasn't. This time is was about Cam Gigandet, that's right Cam Frickin' Gigandet! EEP! So here's the dream. He was showing me his scrap book that he had made when he was a little kid and it had all of these things in there that he made (it was so adorably cute, you would have loved to see that thing) But then someone (I think it was Amanda Bynes but I'm not sure) came over when we weren't looking and ripped something out of the book! Cam was really upset because those were his childhood memories and if they're gone you're never gonna get them back. So anyways he was sitting on the floor in front of the scrapbook all upset and I sat down next to him and put my arms around his shoulders and he put his head on my shoulder and I comforted him and then I helped him fix it. Gosh, I'm like the best friend ever right?!?! :D

So that was the dream and it was fantastic! :D



I'll try not to dwell to0 much on the fact that Cam and Taylor are my dream best friends. :D

Something Worth Living For

I have come to the conclusion that Harry Potter is the best thing in the entire world, or should I say in my entire life (as something else may be better in the entire world for you people) Although I knew this years ago, I just happen to be writing about it now. I know we're older now and more mature (possibly) but we grew up with Harry Potter and although it took my a while to finally read the books (it didn't take me that long to get addicted as that happened about 4 pages into the Sorcerer's Stone) there was still always something to look forward to. The next book coming out or the next movie coming out. Reading these books over and over (which I have done about 4 times now and I plan to read again over Winter Break) and watching these movies has completed my life in a way I didn't know possible. I smile every time I think about the joys of Harry's world and the wish that I could join him. Everything seems so much better in books (although Harry's life ultimately sucks when you think about it) and there is something that makes you want to live their life instead. The world of Harry Potter is just so bad-ass that I can't even imagine someone who wouldn't want to be a wizard. :D I literally could talk about Harry Potter for hours, that's how into it I am. Nothing makes me happier than having a deep chat about Harry Potter. :D

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love Harry Potter with all my heart and I am so very glad to have found this amazing thing to cherish for the rest of my life.

"I know we've got a fight ahead of us, but we've got something that Voldemort doesn't have.....Something worth fighting for" -Harry Potter

True, and I guess in my case "I've got something worth living for". :D

So perfect

There are just somethings worth living for, things that are so perfect that they complete your life in a way you didn't think possible. :D

And this just so happens to be one of those things. :D

Good Grief

You can do whatever the hell you want.
Who am I to judge?

I guess I just need to get over myself.

Boyfriend

Just watch. It speaks for itself. :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jP1WqkqDcpo

I'm thinking of replacing it with "Gonna be Taylor Lautner's girlfriend tonight" or maybe someone else. Who knows. :D

Taylor Frickin' Lautner

So I had another awesome dream. EEP!

We (and by we I mean my peeps, well I remember Mai specifically) were at an Awards show for something or other. Were sitting in our seats and a famous celebrity has a microphone in hand and is talking to the rest of the audience. He then comes and walks down OUR aisle and stands RIGHT NEXT to us!!

Who was this famous person, you may ask, and why am I so excited about it?

Three words: Taylor Frickin' Lautner



This has got to be the most exciting fake experience of my young life, let me tell you. :D

Bravo Mr. Somerhalder

You make Paul proud.

"Donning a blondish wig, a black blazer and some serious cheek bones, Ian played his co-star Paul to a T."

That's right, revel in your awesomeness. :D

You're more than welcome

You know the saying "You're welcome" that someone says after they have been thanked by someone else? Well you also know how some people say "You're more than welcome."

Well today I was working and the guys I work with were discussing this. Here is the conversation:

Andrew: "Thanks"
Jake: "You're more than welcome."
Andrew: "What's more than welcome? I mean what is the next level after welcome?"
Megan: "Socialism."

I meet so many interesting people at work and we had a lovely time contributing our opinions on people's white boards. :D

This is your life

So I had this really weird dream. Here it goes play by play.

I am walking down one of the isle in some store (Wal-Mart maybe or Target) and I have medium size Simba and Nala stuffed animals under my left arm. As I'm walking I hear someone say "I guess she's buying that thing for her son" (referring to the Simba) but another person says "No, look at the girl one, so maybe it's for both". (This makes me think of how gender is socially constructed, I guess I am learning something in that class) I then walk up to the register and the lady looks at me very rudely. Then she goes "You know how we feel about people pretending to be Santa Clause in order to meet the President" (ok, wtf?!?!) and she asks me to show her my ID. I do and she obviously doesn't believe that it's real. I can't really blame her since I take a look at the ID and there it is on the top, the words Interview With A Vampire and I'm pretty sure there was a photo of Christian Slater instead of me.

And that's where the dream ended or I woke up. I don't really recall, but all I know is is that you can't make this shit up. haha. :D

Obsession

By definition obsessed means "having or showing excessive or compulsive concern with something". Now when you hear the words obsessed or having an obsession with usually means that the person is probably a psycho. Like stalking the person they are obsessed with by climbing in their windows or following them around and hiding in bushes or some other creepy shit like having an entire wall covered in photos that you took of them without their knowledge.

Now it has come to my attention that people seem to think I am "obsessed" with certain things. Well I'm not. I do not stalk people. I do not find out where they live and stay outside their house in the bushes secretly taking photos of them. I do not know where they are every second of every day. I do however have a slight.....let's say fondness for certain people.

That's it. I am fond of those people. NOT obsessed.

Now that that is cleared up. Let's eat cake while wearing a fedora. :D

BS or straight up true?

I was watching this movie and a line came up that said:

"Every woman has the exact love life she wants." -The Wedding Date

This may be true in the sense that if a woman (or a man, that was just the exact quote) is very to themselves and is reserved then they will never put themselves out there and will never end up in a relationship. It may also be true that if a man or a woman does not find it worth it to be in a relationship or has commitment issues then they will not find themselves in a relationship either. But do you think that those people who ARE in relationships want them to be bad ones? For example:

Do you think Rihanna wanted to get beaten by Chris Brown?
Do you think Elin Nordegren wanted her husband Tiger to have multiple affairs?
Do you think that chick on Oprah wanted her husband to sleep with guys and give her HIV?
Do you think the chick from this movie wanted her fiance to sleep with her sister multiple times?

I don't think so. So my question is to you.

Do YOU think that every person has the exact love life they want?

Act your age

God dammit!

I fucking hate Miley Cyrus.

1) She is a 17 year old girl with teeny bopper fans, you would think she would act more appropriate
2) She dresses like a whore in every single video now
3) SHE IS FUCKING 17!!!!
4) When she's older she can just as much of a skank as she wants to but right now when her biggest audience is your average 12 year old, she should really think about the way she acts
5) I get it that she wants to change the style of her music to appeal to a bigger audience but wearing clothes (or should I say lackthereof) is not going to get the attention she wants
6) She is a role model whether she likes it or not. She started out on Disney and that's what is slowly murdering her and that is why she has to act this way
7) Want proof of her provocative behavior? Just go to these links.
Her LAP DANCE video:
http://www.redlasso.com/ClipPlayer.aspx?id=0c2cf386-5eaf-4505-b725-224675566e53
Her new video "Who Owns My Heart"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5XYcGQHPG8
8) She disgusts me and
9) FUCK YOU MILEY CYRUS!!

He has a point

It is true that there are issues out there that we only think apply to certain groups of people. Take breast cancer awareness month. Whose to say that it only affects women? Because it doesn't. Honestly, it didn't even cross my mind that men are effected as well. It's just a world wide thing to associate breast cancer with women. So I have thought long and hard about both sides and just so you know I'm not saying this just to agree with the person who got heated up about the issue. I however do agree with him and know he has a point. (Please believe that I am not trying to get into good graces with him, (not that I was out of them) it's just something I was thinking about and I have to put it out there (I mean I didn't even know what the whole "I like it on...." even meant in the first place))

I just mean that issues, like he said, should not be gender specific or any kind of specific. Anything that is wrong with the world effects every single living, breathing, creature on said world. Like we're learning in G & WS 102, women fought for equal rights and made changes to their lives. But even though it was women who were fighting for these things did this not also effect men? Of course it did. It effected men in just as many ways as it did women.

All I'm saying is that we should take everyone into consideration. We'll all important and we should be treated as such.

That is all.

Peace up, A-Town down. (Yeah, I wrote it)

Grenade

"I would die for you. But I won't live for you." - The Fountainhead

In order for you to be there for another person you have to be there for yourself first. You have to live your own life and make your own decisions. It's up to you to make a choice to share that with other people.

If you live for someone else then who is living for you?

It Has it's Perks

Dear Charlie,

Thank you.

I hope to one day feel as you did riding in the car with Sam and Patrick listening to "Asleep" by the Smiths. I hope to one day feel infinite.

Love always,
Katie

Did I stutter?

I don't care what non y'all say.

I LOVE JUSTIN BIEBER
And not in the "I'd love to throw a water bottle at him" kind of way

(Ain't he the darndest?) :D

"Well that was easy"

There's something nagging at the back of my mind.

I can't get rid of it. I don't really think I want to. There's really nothing I can do about it and yet there are so many things that I can do. All I know is that I want something to change. I miss it and that makes me want to be closer to it. Really get to know it and be happy afterward. It seems so far away and its perfectly in reach if I just reach for it. But I can't bring myself to do it. There are so many factors standing in my way and yet at the same time there is nothing whatsoever stopping me. I know that if I just go out and do it then everything will be alright. Or it might not be but I should at least try right?

I wish there were some kind of easy button.

This is how you remind me

I saw someone who reminded me of you today.

I smiled inside. :D

Laundry People

ARE SO STUPID!!

GOD! When it's time for you laundry to be done COME AND FREAKING GET IT! Is it that difficult to set an alarm of some kind, hear it go off, GET OFF YOUR ASS, and go and get your stupid shit?!?!? I DON'T THINK SO.

BUT NO..................All of you people have to take your sweet time and make random people who you will never meet or have a conversation with curse under their breathe about you. GOSH, I HATE YOU LAUNDRY PEOPLE. I mean really?!?! I waited 15 minutes........15 MINUTES!!! FOR YOU STUPID PEOPLE TO COME AND TAKE OUR YOUR CRAP!!

BUT NO ONE CAME!!

And all the while other washers are opening up and now more people don't come! GOD! Is it too much to ask for you people to not be stupid?!??!?! If you had something else to do then DON'T DO YOUR FREAKING LAUNDRY!! Let someone else who ACTUALLY has the time to watch it DO IT!!

Man! I hate you laundry people.

Nooo....I want him to askkkkk.

Okay so.......

Why is it that people think that the guy has to be the one to ask the girl out? This isn't the 1950's and women are independent. But due the travesty of societal norms all of us girls (or some I should say) feel the need to be asked out by the guy of their liking. "I mean how else am I gonna know if he likes me or not?" Blah blah blah.

Why is it that the guy that has to be the one to risk rejection and not the girl. WE ARE ALL AT THE RISK OF REJECTION!! They don't call it a crush for nothing. Sheesh. The girl is perfectly capable of asking the guy out on a freaking date if she so chooses. And who knows, this guy might actually be happy this chick had the balls to ask him out. (Not that he wants her to have balls of course....unless he does....which would mean his rejection of her would be for a completely different reason)

But the reason I'm saying this is that I remember back in high school and the dance or something horrible was coming up. And I could hear all these girls blathering on about how they want this guy or that guy to ask them to the dance. But God forbid when one person suggests that they ask him, they're all like "Nooooo! I want him to ask!" (in a high pitched girlie voice)

Anyways this just came into my head after reading Tia's blog about exchanging phone numbers. I don't really know the context behind it but it got me thinking about relationships and junk. And well we have come full circle and here we are.

Well since I have put this out there I guess I will have to follow my own advice when the time comes. (That's to say that this is not relevant at this particular moment in my young life) "I should practice what I preach"

But then again, I really don't think I would do anything about it whatsoever. If I like a guy then that's that. I like him. I'm not about to ask him out because..... I just don't want to. Who says that you actually have to date the guy? Can't you just have the joy of liking him and keeping it all to yourself (and friends apparently)? Gosh I'm ranting about a whole other subject. SCRATCH THIS!!

I should just stop before it gets any worse.

Well ta ta for now. :D

Hello Mr. Sun

Hello Mr. Sun.
Today's the day we change our plans and end the war against our old selves.
So goodbye Mr. Rain, your time has come, your time has gone, so send your gray skies to someone else.
Sun shine on down, ease our trouble now, sun shine on down.
Sun shine on down, wring our worries out, sun shine on down.


Ahh.....such a lovely sentiment from a lovely song sang by the lovely voice of a lovely young man. :D

I'm Alive, I'm Dreaming

I love dreams. They are the best, especially the ones that make you smile when you wake up. For example the one I had last night made me very very happy. I still can't believe that I dreamed it. Ok, I pretty much can because.....yeah. :D

So the dream consisted of:
Edward Cullen in the background (He slightly looked like R Pattz for some unknown reason)
Bella Swan (I couldn't exactly see her face, but hopefully she didn't look like Kristen)
Jacob Black (Shirtless and looking EXACTLY like Taylor Lautner)
Jacob worrying that Edward was going to steal Bella from him (Ironic huh?)
Jacob coming to me with his problem (I was his best friend, obviously)

Me comforting Jacob with a big huge hug where I touched his muscular shoulders and the back of his neck and hair. (It was a nice embrace)
Then me giving him a kiss on the cheek and grabbing his hand and leading him away from the mean Bella and Edward.

It was a good dream. THE BEST EVER! :D

Fill the heart with happiness

I just would like to share this with the world. : D

Now don't take this as a sentiment that I have given up my love for dear Taylor Lautner. Because I'm in no way doing that. It just goes to show that the heart is constantly making room for others. And this is my heart making room for Sir Paul Wesley and Sir Ian Somerhalder.

The Dayman Cometh

♫Dayman (aaaahhha)
Fighter of the Nightman (aaaahha)
Champion of the sun (aaaahhha)
Master of Karate and friendship for everyone. ♫

I love It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. <3

Mornin' Sunshine

There's something about you. I don't what it is exactly but I know it's there. Maybe it's those eyes (Oh those eyes) or that smile (that lights up the room) or your sense of humor (I can never get enough). You don't even know that you hold me to you with just your mere presence. Our time together is perfect but never seems to be enough. I'm kicking myself for the moments between us that I've wasted but there will always be plenty of time for that.

It's the simple things that get me:
Although I know a "hello" hug will inevitably lead to a "goodbye" hug, I cannot be without.
A beautiful smile, a wave, a laugh, a couple elbow touches and a little nearness. That's what ultimately gets me.

The world has come between us, our lives have come between us, but I know one day we'll find our way back to each other. <3

"What you see is more than what you get." Lol. Oh gosh. :D

Flocks, fish and family

Spending time with the people you love like family makes:

The sun shine a little longer
The waves of Jewett lake a little smoother
The sky a little bluer
The sea gulls a little feistier
The fish a little friskier
The tans appear a little quicker
The inner tubes spin a little faster
The water splashes a little crazier
The boat rides a little breezier
The smiles a little brighter
The hugs a little warmer
The laughs a little louder
The games a Skip-bo a little sillier
The feelings a little stronger
The eyes shine a little clearer
The closeness a little friendlier
The days a little lovelier

Spending time with the people you love like family makes your life a little better. <3

"Hey Minnesota, the best things in life are simple"

Just The Way You Are

Bruno Mars is a romantic. hehe. :D

"When I see your face, there's not a thing that I would change cuz you're amazing just the way you are.
And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while cuz you're amazing just the way you are.
You know, you know, I'd never ask you to change. If perfects what you're looking for then just stay the same."

Sweetest song ever! <3

Finding My Mind

So upon watching It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Charlie and Mac decided they needed health insurance. (After Dee has a heart attack they realized they needed to protect themselves since Frank denied Dennis and Dee health insurance because he only wanted to pay for himself) But in order to get health insurance they needed a job that came with benefits. Hence the two of them getting a job at a big-wig company working in the mail room.

And according to Charlie, the mail never stops. He thus began to lose his mind while doing all the work that Mac and him were supposed to be doing together (Mac was busy trying to make a name for himself by pretending to be the new guy in the office). Charlie started seeing this guy in a trench coat who would give him cigarettes and thought there was a whole conspiracy theory going on at the company. (Of course there wasn't). Charlie lost his mind and Mac was very upset when he found out they lost their jobs as well.

After all of this hilarious chaos ensued it made me wonder whether it was worse to realize you lost your mind or to try and find your mind once you've lost it.

You never hear about people finding their minds, just about them losing it. Most people are told that they've lost their minds b/c they themselves do not realize this. (hence Charlie) So I wonder what it would be like to have to find your mind. Do you actually have to lose it in order to find it again? You know how people do things to find themselves. This doesn't necessarily mean that they've lost themselves in the first place. They just....find themselves. So if this how finding your mind works?

I wonder what it takes to find your mind. I hope I don't lose my mind in the process. :D

Bloody Hell, it's a baby!

SHE'S PREGNANT!!!

Miranda Kerr is pregnant!

ORLANDO BLOOM IS GOING TO BE A FATHER!!!!!

Holy crap that baby will be gorgeous!

:D :D :D

Disney and Nickelodeon

Attention: All of the kids on disney and Nickelodeon have some famous relative or have been acting since they were in diapers.

You would think that a new show would bring new faces....but no! That's not possible with Disney Channel. All those stupids kids had something going for them before they came to disney channel (or Nickelodeon)

Let's begin by going through many disney and Nick shows.

Hannah Montana: Miley Cyrus belongs to that Hillbilly Billy Ray who used to be famous. Nuff said. Emily Osment, her brother is Haley Joel Osment. Nuff said. Mitchell Musso, his brother Mason is in the band Metro station (Along side Miley's brother Trace Cyrus). Nuff said.

That's so Raven: Raven Symone, acting on the Cosby show when she was teeny. Nuff said. (Who also happens to be a singer...damn Disney). Kyle Massey, his brother was on Zoey 101. Nuff said.

Wizards of Waverly Place: Selena Gomez was on Barney when she was a kiddie. An episode of The Suite life of Zach and Cody. On Hannah Montana. Nuff said. David Henry, on That's so Raven. Nuff said. Jake T. Austin, Diego from Go, Diego Go. Nuff said

The Suite Life of Zach and Cody: Those guys have been in like every movie imaginable when they were young! Nuff said.

Zoey 101: Chris Massey, brother to Kyle. Nuff said. Jamie Lynn Spears, yeah I really don't need to mention her sister. We ALL know about her sister. Nuff said.

Drake and Josh: Both Drake and Josh were on the Amanda Show ages ago. Nuff said.

iCarly: Mirando Cosgrove, started on Drake and Josh. (AND is a singer now! Nick is just as bad). Nuff said.

So like I said. All of these people started out somewhere else and there is just nothing we can really do about it. We will never see a brand new face.....like EVER. I mean they may seem new to you but in reality they have probably been acting since they were 2.

Disney

Attention: Disney Channel whores out their stars.

Just because you're an actor on Disney Channel DOES NOT (I repeat NOT) mean that you can miraculously sing too.

I mean the acting on that channel is already substandard so why do all of those stupid kids (Who are by the way stuck in the Disney channel scene for the rest of their lives.....I kind of realize why Miley has become a whore. She wants to leave Disney) have to sing too??!?!

OR there are those kids who sing and then end up on Disney Channel (Allstar Weekend for example. I actually like these guys and I think they would go way further if they weren't signed with Disney)

WHY DOES EVERY STINKIN' TEENIE BOPPER HAVE TO BE ABLE TO SING AND ACT?!?!?!
I mean I'll admit that Miley can sing (gag me), and Selena Gomez can sing (Love her) and Demi Lovato can sing (She has the biggest mouth in the world, like literally, look at those choppers) and Mitchel Musso can sing (I love him too! :D) BUT BUT BUT they started out as ACTORS!!!! Damn! I mean it's one thing to actually want to be on disney channel to try and launch your acting career (Which Disney does help to do) but APPARENTLY the ability to sing is in the job description.

I although do like Disney Channel, I watch it on occasion. Mostly just Wizards of Waverly Place and Jonas LA (Don't even get me started on that....those boys can sing but apparently they have to be actors now too. I love the show but still....)

I guess what I'm really trying to say is that.....Miley Cyrus is a whore. Yup. :D

Love has many faces

This blog post was inspired by Tia Thao

There are many different kinds of love. You love your family (hopefully otherwise you're probably going to hell) You love your friends (I mean if you don't then why are you friends with them in the first place. Oh I get it the whole keep your enemies closer thing. I gotcha. Shhh) And there the people you love who will never really know you love them (and I don't mean secret crushes. Celebrities! duh!)

There are a lot (and I mean A LOT) of celebrities that I love. You all know that. I can't even keep track sometimes. But there comes a time when you really have to evaluate the reasons behind your love for these people.

There are usually 2 types of celebrities. Actors and singers. And I have come to find that there is a difference between the love you have for an actor and the love you have for a singer.

Let's begin shall we. Well I'm going to be discussing the British community in particular. :D

Orlando Bloom.
Born: January 13, 1977 (Yes, I know his b-day off the top of my head)

So I first saw this beautiful man in Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl. (One of my all time favorite movies) And first of all I was blown away by how awesome the movie was in the first place and then I noticed him and how......gorgeous he is. sigh. :D

So after that I pretty much was dedicated to everything about him. I've seen a vast majority of his movies and definitely seen my majority of his interviews (Oh the joys of Youtube) I also have a fabulous poster of him that is just breathe taking and I have one of him from POTC 3: At Word's End.

So here's my point to be exactly: Actors pretend to be someone else, while at the same time being themselves. Many actors real personalities come out in the roles that they play and that helps to make the character more real and more relatable. So what I think is that even though I watched all of those movies because of Orlando, I have also come to love the characters he plays.

An Elf from Rivendale, a pirate in the Caribbean, a Trojan in Troy, a troubled young man in Caymen, a suicidal shoe maker , a composer with writers block and so many others.

Although he is not any of these people in real life he still puts all of his heart into his roles. He makes them come alive and makes people love him and want to root for him. He brings himself out while he pretends to be someone else. And that's what I find to be so inspiring.

Joe Brooks
Born: May 18, 1987 (I had to look this one up)

I first discovered him....on Monday actually. Again I have Youtube to thank for this. I would just like to say that his kid (Ok a 23 year old is not exactly a kid) has some major ass talent. I mean seriously. He is going to be incredibly famous. Anyways as a singer his heart is already in the songs he sings. The lyrics are his and I assume that they depict the life that he's living right at this very moment. The song titles themselves say a lot about him.

Superman, Getting Away, World at Your Feet, My Heart Will Wait, I Find the Light in You, and so many others.

All of his songs have a special meaning to him and they come from the heart. Being a singer is so much more then having a great voice (Which he does by the way...just sayin) it's about the soul you have that is put into the songs that you sing. Most singers and Joe included hope to inspire others and I am definitely inspired by his songs (and his sexy velvety voice). I feel like I know him in some way just through his songs because they tell so much.

Now that I've said that I love both singers and actors, I hope you get that I love them in different ways. Because they are different. And I love them for that. :D

P.S. Don't even get me started on Ewan McGregor. (Mulan Rouge....nuff said. :D)

Class is in session

Today we are going to discuss: The Cougar

Disclaimer: This does not in anyway mean that I am a cougar because I'm not. Not matter what you people seem to think in regards to my love for a certain sexy wolf-boy.

The Definition of a Cougar: A 35+ year old female who is on the "hunt" for a much younger man.
AKA "Man is cougar's number one prey"

And you know that there are a lot of cougars out there. Here are some famous examples (and I totally understand why these woman do this. I mean have you seen these men?!?!)

Halle Berry, 43 and Gabriel Aubry, 33 (Sexy couple)
Deborra Furness, 54 and Hugh Jackman, 41 (Well he's sexy)
Mariah Carrey, 39 and Nick Cannon, 28 (Ehh, I totally find them awkward)
Demi Moore, 46 and Ashton Kutcher, 31 (Hot couple)
Courtney Cox, 45 and David Arquette, 38 (Very cute couple)
Eva Longoria, 34 and Tony Parker, 27 (Hot couple)
Madonna, 51 and Jesus Luz, 22 (Idk who he is but he's got sexy eyes)

OK so what I'm really trying to say is that sometimes you can't help going after that younger guy. And sometimes you don't even know that they're younger than you. But at our age (Which is still very young) means that when you see a "delicious brown boy", these things go through your head and sometimes end up out loud.
1. He's cute!
2. I wonder how old he is?
3. I wonder what his name is?
4. How old does he look to you?
5. I wonder how old he thinks I am?
6. Man, how old is he?!?!

See at our age we are very cautious of noticing cute guys because there is a very good chance that they are YOUNGER then you. I mean once you hit 18 you really have to beware of the legal system. I mean I know Miley doesn't really care about that kind of thing but then again she's a slut. So that's to be expected. But for people like us who are NOT like Miley, we are very careful. (Ok I realize that Miley's not a cougar but I think that she is a witch. Why else would these really hot guys want to date her? Ehmmm...Liam Hemsworth)

OK, now on an ending note. When it comes down to is is that it doesn't really matter how old you are if you really love the person. But REMEMBER cougars are usually OVER 35!! (See examples above) I mean at 19 you really can't be a cougar if you're into a guy who happens to be a year, 1 month and 6 days younger than you. Just sayin'. :D

Well that's all for now.

Bloody Hell

He's married. :(..... :/..... :)...... :D

Orlando Bloom is married! (You sexy British actor you)

I can just picture it now. The two of them sitting at a fancy resaurant in some far away country. Him getting down on one knee and spilling his heart out to her. (Oh Orlando, you romantic devil you) Then the wedding. He's standing at the alture looking dashing (You suave devil you) and her walking down the isle looking ravishing (she is a Vicky's Secret Model after all). Then they exchange vows and he whispers sweet nothings in her ear as they exchange very expensive rings. Then the honeymoon where they are wisked away to some island off of the coast of God knows where and then....... (If you catch my drift)

I wish Orlando and Miranda a happy life together, full of happines. :D

P.S. They will make gorgeous babies. No joke.

Inception

THE.BEST.MOVIE.OF.THE.SUMMER.

Absolutely fantastic. It literally blew my mind.

Just Beautiful. :D

Phases

So I apparently have a lot of phases.

OK these phases are mostly about famous actors. Now I'm going to list my phases if I can remember them all. :D But these right here were/are my MAJOR phases.

1: Orlando Bloom.
I had a huge Orlando Bloom phase. I still call him my first husband. I mean I obviously don't feel like he's an ex-husband just yet since I have a hug poster of him that I smile at every time I go to sleep. But this whole phases started when I first saw Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl. He was just so amazingly amazing that I loved him from the start. I mean not to take anything about from Mr. Depp who is phenomenal I just saw something in that beautiful brown hair of Orlando's. :D And I also took the liberty of watching like a TON of Orli's movie's because I just HAD to keep watching. And I watched like a thousand of his interviews.

2: Michael Phelps.
So I have always loved the Olympics and of course the summer Olympics in Beijing was just so epic that I will remember it forever. But Michael Phelps was even more epic then the Olympics itself. I watched everyone of his races and got super duper intense when he raced Cavic and ALMOST lost!! it was crazy! Gosh, that was amazing! AHHH! Thinking about it again is making me all giddy. But anyways after that I was totally into Michael and his bionic swimming methods. And not to mention he has a very nice swimmers body. I do feel sad about the whole him smoking a bong thing but hey everyone experiments apparently. Don't worry Micheal. I have an amazing calendar of you and I could never hate you.

3. JT from Degrassi.
I cried when he was stabbed in the back (literally) by that stupid rival school. They ruined everything! But anyways after that I was just like I can't get enough of JT. I just don't understand how they could kill such an amazing guy like JT! AND AND AND he was gonna go and get back together with Liberty! It would have been magical. :( Don't get me wrong I don't hold anything against Ryan Cooley (JT) for wanting to go to college instead of continuing with the show. It was really sad as the cast was reading the script for the episode and Ryan was the only one of the cast who knew they JT was going to die. After that he gave a speech and started to cry. It really touched my heart.

4. Taylor Lautner.
He will never be a phase for me. He will be a lifetime. Gosh, I just love him so much! He's an amazing actor and from all of the millions of interviews of him that I've watched he seems like a really genuine person! I so want to meet him! IT WOULD MAKE MY LIFE!!!! I LOVE HIM!! And I have literally bought EVERY magazine that he's in and I have a gorgeous calender of him and I have seen like everything he's been in even though that hasn't been all that much but I will for sure be going to see all the stuff he does in the future. Just to show my dedication I even know where he is right now! OK, I don't know the EXACT location because that would be creepy but I do know what state he's in and he's shooting his new movie! I wanna go there and meet him! It would be unlike anything else. I JUST LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!! And I don't think he will ever become an ex-husband like Orlando. He's my soul mate. He just doesn't know it because he just hasn't meet my yet.

ok, I don't have that many phases I guess but that is A LOT OF TESTOSTERONE. haha. :D

Rickety Cricket

Greatest nickname EVER

-It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Well what do you know....

You really do learn something new everyday.

Toothpaste helps to get the smell of rib seasoning off your hands. :D

Realization

Love triangles can be devastatingly heart breaking to those on the inside looking out, but are utterly eye opening to those on the outside looking in.

Longing....

Hot damn!

I wanna kiss Taylor Lautner. :D

Things Movies Have Taught Me

From all of the movies I've seen there are so many that have become my favorites. And from all of these movies there are a few things that I've learned from them.


17 Again: You really can be 17 again and have a rocking body at that.

The Bourne Identity: You can stab someone with a pen with much effectiveness

The Bourne Supremacy: Don't try and hide in India, they will find you and they will kill your significant other.

The Bourne Ultimatum: You can kill an assassin with a book.

A Cinderella Story: Your secret admirer will never be an axe murderer but a hot guy from you high school.

The Dark Knight: Clowns aren't scary but instead are severely bad-ass.

27 Dresses: If someone annoys you enough you will end up happily married to them

Driving Lessons: Crazy old ladies make the best of friends

Eagle Eye: Never trust computers that can think for themselves

Elizabethtown: You can peak on the phone

Enchanted: If you're an animated character you will end up a real person smack dab in the middle of New York.

Hairspray: You can always take down the jealous bitch lady and steal her stuck-up daughter's boyfriend.

Harry Potter 1: If you're a wizard you will be informed of this by a giant with an umbrella

Harry Potter 2: You can kill a giant snake with a glittering sword

Harry Potter 3: The tress will attack you if you piss them off

Harry Potter 4: Anyone can battle a dragon but defeat a man with no nose? Not so easy.

Harry Potter 5: You can suffer from extreme teen angst

Harry Potter 6: In every cave there are dead people in the bottom of its lake

Haven: You can make very powerful acid in a high school science class

He's Just Not That Into You: If a guy acts like he doesn't give a shit then he genuinely doesn't give a shit.

High School Musical: If you sing with some random person at a lodge you will fall madly in love with them later

High School Musical 2: You can work at a resort and no one will think you're weird for breaking out into song

High School Musical 3: Graduating high school is way less exciting then you think.

Jumper: If you fall in a lake you will end up in the middle of a library and have no idea how you got there

Law Abiding Citizen: Sometimes innocent people go to jail while the guilty go free.

Mamma Mia!: If you don't know who your father is just break out into song and you'll find him

Mean Girls: You really can take down the mean girl but you'll become the new bitch on the block

Nancy Drew: If you try and solve a case that's not yours to solve your father will be kidnapped

Ocean's Eleven: You can knock over 3 casinos with a talented group of cons who happened to be the best looking group of guys you have ever seen

Ocean's Twelve: Foreign people can move through lasers without being detected

Ocean's Thirteen: If you mess with someones good friend you will be taken for all your worth

Pirates of the Caribbean 1: You can trust pirates if they're from the Caribbean and not Somalia

Pirates of the Caribbean 2: If you're engaged and you kiss someone else your fiance will not take it well

Pirates of the Caribbean 3: If you're stuck in Davey Jones Locker you will go crazy. But don't worry your ship will be there to keep you company

The Proposal: If you're male your boss will blackmail you into marrying her. If you're female your assistant will be extremely hot.

Sherlock Holmes: You can successfully fake your own death

She's the Man: If you dress up like a guy you will get the guy

10 Things I Hate About You: The guy who was paid to take you out will fall madly in love with you

Troy: It is possible to start a war over a chick

Twilight: If you walk into the woods, a vampire will follow you and demand you to tell him what he is, all the while never looking at you

New Moon: Werewolves are way better company then Vampires

Up: If you want to go places take your house will you

Up In the Air: Even the George Clooney types get cheated on. All hope is lost

Without A Paddle: High up in the mountains, red necks are growing acres of pot

Wish Upon A Star: If you wish to become your sister it will happen

X-Men: There are people out there who are different from you. Be jealous

X-Men 2: You can attempt to kill a whole race of people will just your mind

X-Men The Last Stand: If you try and cut your wings off they will grow back. Plus it's quite painful.

Fate? I think so

This morning I woke up and turned the tv on and the first face I see if the face of my soulmate. :D

I call it fate. <3

Somebody to love

"I just need somebody to love, I don't need too much, just somebody to love."

I love this song and I think it realy applies to me. Maybe not the "need" but more like the desire. But here's the thing: You will never know how much I love you. It may sound a little weird or obsessive. But that's just me.

I've got 99 problems but loving you ain't one. :D

Mind of a Criminal

There are so many shows on TV that depict the crimes of society.

These shows show the real life horrors that happen everyday and yet they are on television for our own entertainment. In no way am I bashing these shows because I admittedly love them. They are so interesting and it's so amazing to see how the crimes are solved no matter how gruesome.

Although I enjoy watch Criminal Minds and the beautiful Derek Morgan (played by Shemar Moore) and Dr. Reid who is so bad-ass (Cristina, I can see why you love him so much now) I come to think how desensitized we are.

I mean come on! They are solving murders here, stuff that actually happens in real life and yet we don't even think about that fact. There are so many factors to these shows that should make us terrified of what's out there.

But then again how is that any way to live? So I guess what I'm trying to say and I guess I'm contradicting myself while I do is that we should watch these shows as entertainment and not be afraid of what's behind our backs.

Hmmm, that's interesting. I shall have to think this over some more.

On Sebatical

I'm having trouble sleeping.

I'll go to bed and lay there for like an hour trying to fall asleep. But I can't fall asleep. My mind keeps racing and I can't make it slow down. I think about so many things and I just can't calm myself down enough to fall asleep. And well since I'm having so many thoughts all at once and not all of them are pleasant thoughts my heart will start racing and that makes it even harder to fall asleep.

The things I think about while lying in bed trying to sleep:

1:How dark it is in the house since I'm the one who goes to bed the latest. But then again I need it to be dark in order for me to fall asleep.

2:What would happen if someone broke into the house in the middle of the night. (But then I remind myself that my dad locks the house tighter then a drum) but then I start thinking about movies like Law Abiding Citizen and I think that a person could break into the house by you opening the door without knowing who it is. I also think about stories about how people's houses have been broken into and it freaks me out even more.

3: What the heck am I doing with my life? Nothing! That's right, nothing! I can't even get a job when I for once actually want one. I think it would help me relax to be doing something for an entire day. Gosh, I really want to be hired at Borders but of course the economy sucks and I am not hearing anything back.

4: I really don't wanna start school again in the fall but I know it'll be good for me to go back. But this is the first summer that I've actually had a summer and yet I'm not doing anything with my summer. I am just sitting around all day not doing anything.

5: I miss my family members and friends of the family that have passed away. I wish they were still here but I can't do anything about it. I miss my doggy and she made me feel safe in the house at night. But with these family members being gone I get scared if anything would happen to my parents or my brother or any of my other family members. I don't know what I would do if they were gone. I know I wouldn't be able to survive without them.

6: I wonder if I should be reading a book to help my fall asleep but then I would have to get up and go get one and I think that what if I was about to fall asleep but I just got up and missed my chance to fall asleep. But reading really does help me fall asleep.

7: I want new books to read. I've read the books I have so many times over and over again and I love them so much but I want something new to read. I want a new story.

8: I'm spending all my money on seeing movies with friends. But I love movies too much to stop doing it. And of course I just have to go and see these movies or I might go insane. Gosh, I love movies.

9: Maybe I should be doing something with movies with my life. I would love to be a part of that. I also really want to write a book. I need something in the middle since those are my favorite things to do.

10: Last night I was thinking about what it would be like to talk to a therapist. I think I would like just to have someone to talk to. I mean look at all these thoughts I have and it would be great to just have them listen.

11: I feel like I need a companion. I don't know why but I feel like I should have one. I think I'm just lonely in that aspect. I love being with my friends since they complete me but then I see some of my friends and they have this other person who is always there for them when we're not with them. I want that.

12: I think I should go outside but I would have nothing to do out there since no one is with me. Everyone is far away and there can't come and hang out with me. I just want to do something that seems fulfilling like yesterday when we all hung out down town. That was doing something.

13: I have obsessions. Movies, books, actors (one in particular). And I feel like I'm complete with these things but I wonder what makes me so obsessed with them. It's weird to think about the reasons why.

I wonder if there is someway to just stop all of these thoughts so I can go to sleep.

Beauty is only skin Deep

There are so many people in this world that are considered "beautiful". But what is beauty really? Is it their eyes? Their lips? Their chest? Their butt? All of those kinds come to mind when you think of what beauty is. But are these the things that really make them beautiful?

I think not.

You might wanna dig a little deeper to find their true beauty. You may meet the most attractive person but at the same time they can be the ugliest person. So what makes a person beautiful? Their personality? Their heart? Their soul? Their need and want to be nothing more but themselves?

I think so.

So, remember and carry this with you:
"What makes you different, makes you beautiful."

Dedication

And I'm telling you that I'm not going.
You're the best man I'll ever know.
There's no way I can ever go.
No no, there's no way.
No no no no way.
I'm living without you.

I'm not living without you.
I'm not living without you.
I don't wanna be free.

I'm staying.
I'm staying.
and you---and you---and you.
You're gonna love me.

I dedicate this song to.... ;-)
And with the sentiment that you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover. That being said if you do you may miss out on just how beautiful that cover is.

L.O.V.E

Love, in it's purest form.


Ragardless of race, ethnicity or gender,
If you love someone, fight for them. Always. Fight for them as hard as you can.
If you love someone, love all of them. Love them for the good and the bad, for everything they are. Love every ounce of them and grant them the same cursody to love you in the same way.
If you love someone, love them with your heart, mind, and soul. With your entire spirit.


Without love we have nothing. Without love we are nothing. Without love we are lost.

Listeners

I would like to pride myself on being this great listener.....but why does it feel like no one is listening?

The Ones That Love Us Never Really Leave Us

And we can always find them...in our hearts.

Sometimes you have to experience something new in order to remember something old. And these memories are all that I have now. I wish I could have more but I am greatful for what I have to remember. There is nothing more important then remembering those you love and the fact that they loved you too.

"Even those who are gone are with us as go on."

I really like to think so. I hope they like what they see. :D

Change....it is inevitable

Apparently so is death....but that's besides the point.

People are always changing. Hopefully this change is for the better. I would like to say that I have changed over the years....but into what I'm not exactly sure. So if change is for the best then why am I reminiscing about what someone used to be? Maybe they have changed to prove something to themselves or maybe it's for other people. But why do people change? I remember what it was like last summer. We were all there learning, growing and suffering together. But that's what I liked most about them. They were who they wanted to be and I guess this is what they want to be now. I should be happy for them but there's something holding me back. But here's the thing....it's not like we were even that close. I think the reason I'm thinking like this is because I wish we were...closer. There were little moments last summer when I just threw things on the table and waited for it all to unfold but nothing did. I don't think they will now....I guess I shouldn't say that because I really never know what's going to happen in the future. I think the most important thing is that I should just let them be happy with who they are now if that's what they want.

I think that's what everyone wants...to just be happy with who they are even if that means changing just a little something.

Stranger

I have been inspired by a stranger.

I really underestimate the level of talent others have. You never know what others have been through until you hear them spill their soul in front of all their friends, acquaintances and yes, complete strangers.

Although my intentions of going there were in vain, I do not regret the decision. Unlike me, they were there for a more important reason. They were there to tell their story in the only way they knew how. Many people will spend their whole lives trying to find their muse, but these people have found it and are laying it out on the line for all to see.

All I know is inspiration is upon me.

A Dream State

Dreams to me are very strange. They depict real life but they never really happen in real life. Now why is that? Is there reasoning behind these dreams?

You know that song "A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes"? Well maybe this song explains it all. So my heart is making me have all of these weird dreams about people. Mai says that they mean I miss someone or am thinking about them. That may be true but you never know. I mean I did have 3 dreams about the same person within like the last month. Does that mean that I miss them or are thinking about them? Could be, but I still don't understand dreams.

How come dreams sometimes seem better then real life? I don't see how that could possibly be true. But I guess since they are the projection of what is really in your heart then of course they would be better then what you're actually experiencing in real life.

Maybe life would be better if it were all a dream....wait on second thought that would suck! If I just spent all these years in school and it was all a dream I might have to shank someone.

"You see things and you say "why?" but I dream things that never were, and I ask "Why not?""

Kinship

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget."

This is has been truly a great start to a new month. I love May and most importantly I love my friends. They have been there to be a part of something that I will never forget. So guys, thank you so much for the shenanigans you all let me witness and be a part of. :D

P.S. I absolutely love hugs, break dancing, back muscles, situations, embarrassing bathroom incidents, embarrassing elevator incidents, poking fun, that's what she said jokes, destiny, soul mates, fate, walks on State Street, The Titanic Players, free movies, ice cream, late nights and so much more.

♫ We're here and we're now and we're all together so let's make this last forever ♫

Stress

You know the saying that there's good stress and bad stress?

Well I think that's just dumb. Why on earth would there be any stress that's good?
Example: You see someone cheezin' ear to ear and skipping around like a maniac. Your first reaction is "WTF?" but then once you get over the initial shock of the incident you go up to them and ask "Are you alright?" And then this person runs up to, is all up in yo' grill and shouts "I'm stressed!" and then goes along on their merry way.

Yeah that NEVER happens! I have no idea how stress can be good....I mean I guess I do....but I never feel like stress is good. Usually a person who is stressed has SO MUCH to do that they are actually in the process of RIPPING THEIR HAIR OUT!!! Or maybe yelling at INANIMATE OBJECTS to relieve such stress. I don't find any of these things healthy to say the least.

This much has to be said: I AM STRESSED!!!

Nostalgia

"Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson. You find the present tense and the past perfect."

I for some reason am feeling very nostalgic at the moment. I just want to be young again. There is nothing like the past that can make you feel gloomy about the present. Everything was simple when I was younger. All I did was watch some the greatest TV shows in the world (which may have something to do with why I'm feeling this way), play outside for hours, never wanting to come inside, having the summer to just do what ever a little kid does, spend time with your parents when it was the most exciting thing to do. I wonder why being a little kid was simple but being an adult is so complicated. I just don't understand it. Why are there so many things that need to be done? It seems like it never ends. When you're a child all you do is think about what's happening right at that moment whether it's playing in the mud, or climbing that tree, or playing with the dog, or getting to go over to a friend's house. Nowadays all you think about is the work you have to do today, the next day, the day after that, and the day after that. There no longer seems to be anytime for fun. Even when you do get the chance to just hangout with people, there is still that moment in between that you're thinking I should be doing work instead of being here. Or afterwards when you're thinking that was a lot of fun, but now I have all of this work to do.

I want things to be simple again. I don't know how to do that though. I know there is no way that things will be as simple as they were when I was younger. All it is going to get is harder. More complicated. There is only room to grow but there isn't any room for the uncomplicated, the simple.

There however is one thing that is simple: I miss my childhood.

A Pensieve

Nothing is more magical than the world of Harry Potter. But what I find the most magical, or I guess fascinating is the pensieve. It can replay all of your memories for you and you can be there first hand to witness yourself witnessing an event in your life as it originally took place.

I would love to be able to look back on my memories. Not to change any of them but just to reflect on them with a more accurate assessment. I would really love to be able to see myself when I was a child. That was one of the best times of my life and I recall having so much fun. I would love to have the chance to witness myself experiencing a much simpler time. Which is what it is when you're a little kid. Absolutely no care in the world and the only thing that matters is to have fun. I wish I could think that way now but there are too many things that get in the way. I desperately want to take a vacation from myself and go back to when I was happiest.

If even for a moment...

Thinking takes thought...

I know I shouldn't have to justify my actions or thoughts to others. But should I have to justify them to myself? If I can't figure out my motives for doing something then why am I even doing it? There has to be some kind of reasoning for it. Maybe it's just deep in the back of my mind and I am unwilling to admit the reasons why I do things. Or maybe it's right in front of me but I just can't see it. More like unwilling to see it. I feel like I should know the way my own mind works, or maybe this is a case in which I need to discover the way my subconscious works. But then again how many people can say that they are able to justify things that are in their subconscious? See, I don't know either. I think the things I do and the reasoning behind them are right on the tip of my tongue but I just don't want to taste them or actually have them go down my throat and have to digest them. I don't think I would want to have to digest something I don't have to. But what am I digesting? My own thoughts? The thoughts of others? What other people think of me? What I think of myself? I honestly don't know. It all comes back to question of why we do things. Are we doing them for the benefit of ourselves or for others? Again, I don't know.

So why do we do the things we do? That is the question that goes unanswered. Too bad this is the one answer I'm really looking for.

True Greatness

"No true fiasco ever began as a quest for mere adequacy. The motto of the British Special Air Force is: "Those who risk, win." A single vine shoot is able to grow through cement. The Pacific Northwestern Salmon beats itself bloody on its quest to travel hundreds of miles upstream against the current, with a single purpose, sex of course, but also...life."

Today = Life

I have the tendency to look ahead into the future. There is really nothing wrong with that but I seem to look at the future in a negative light. I think if I'm gonna looking forward to the future I should be doing just that...looking forward to it. But then again at the same time when I look towards the future I tend to forget what's happening today; what's happening right now. The most important thing is the present. If I forget that then what am I even doing? If I don't enjoy what I'm doing today how am I ever going to enjoy tomorrow?

All I have to say is this: You have no idea what's going to happen tomorrow, so enjoy today. Have fun!

Who I am

I want someone to love me for who I am. I want someone to need me. Is that so bad?
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(The writer of this line may only be 17 but he's one smart cookie)
Check out the Who I am video and you'll see. It is a very touching video.

Hollywood's Not America

No matter how much I love movies and the actors that star in them just for us slubs viewing pleasure, I wonder how much they're really giving.

Is this what they wanted to do when they were little? Did Matt Damon want to be Jason Bourne when he was 12? Did Johnny Depp aspire to star in every Tim Burton film ever when he got into the acting business? Did Lindsey Lohan picture her life going to shit after she was successful at 11?

It makes me wonder what these talented people wanted to be when they were younger. I highly doubt all of them would say that they wanted to act when they were just little tykes. I'll bet that there was a huge chunk of these people who wanted to be a doctor and that's what they strived for long ago. How did they get thrown into this life?

I have nothing against the life style that these actors have. I just hope that this is what they want. I mean who enjoys paperattsi creeping behind bushes just to take a picture of them eating? (They act like this is something so intriguing) I really can't stand the idea of people making money by exploiting those who are famous. I would get really sick of it. But then again I'm not famous so I really have no say.

But what I'm basically trying to say through all of this is that I think they're champs. All actors, no matter how talented (or not talented and for some reason are famous...cough cough...Kristen Stewart) or how diva-like or walk around with a stick up their ass or are deep down a genuine person are all champs in my book.

Here's to you [Insert an actor of your preference]

"They didn't act like people and they didn't act like actors. It's hard to explain. They acted more then they knew they were celebrities then anything else."

Don't psychoanalyze me!

I heard this quote from a song and at first it didn't phase me but now that I listened to it over and over again, it really started to make me angry. It goes a little something like this:
"Maybe I'm wrong, you decide. I should have been strong, yeah I lied."

Ok, first of all why in the hell would you want someone else to decide if you're wrong or not?!?! I being a person who does not like to be proven wrong would not want someone telling me that I was wrong. So why would you leave it up to another person whose judgement is so incompetent compared to your own? I tell ya. This just aggravates me. Oh and the whole, I should have been strong part. Yeah ok, what the hell does that mean? How is lying to someone not make you strong? Does it mean that only the weak lie? I think not. I am not weak and admittedly I lie on occasion. Lying is a way of life. I am not preaching to anyone by saying that lying is okay because it's not. It's really not cool but if lying for a good reason makes you...well lie then I don't see how you're weak in this sense. I think in that case you would be made stronger by lying for someone if it was for a good reason.

Maybe I'm just over analyzing this song a bit too much. I mean the next line after that is "Nobody gets me like you." So I guess I may have been going a little bit crazy thinking about this. Oh well. I'll get over it.

Top O' Da Mornin' to ya! (Okay I guess it's the afternoon, but I don't know how that would be said in Irish.)

Some kind of Wonderful

Actually, it's 7 kinds of wonderful.

I have decided that it will be my life goal to visit the 7 Wonders of the World. I shall end up in these places before I die or else. (I don't really know what the or else is but you know...)

I will officially be visiting:
Chichenitza in Mexico
The Taj Mahal in India
Petra in Jordan
The Christ Redeemer in Brasil
Colusseum in Italy
The Great Wall of China
Machu Pichu in Peru.

Wish me luck! This is gonna be a fun time. =]

Religious or Superstitious? That is the question

While I'm walking back from Soc I run into Alec who was having a very intense conversation with some girl. He then interrupts her and starts talking to me. It went down as such:

Alec (To me): "What do you do when you blow an eye lash?"
Me: "You make a wish..."
Alec (To the girl) "Aha!"
Girl (getting annoyed since she was proved wrong): "Whatever, I'm not religious!"
Alec (Laughing): It's not religious, it's superstitious!"

Some people are really dumb sometimes. I've really noticed that. I mean come on! How can you think that blowing an eyelash has anything to do with religion? Seriously...I just don't get some people.

Speaking of people, have you eve had one of those encounters with people who you know but don't really know but kinda of feel obligated to say something to them or at least acknowledge their presence? Well I have. And it happens to be from the same person. I see him almost everyday now and whenever we make eye contact he just gives me this dirty look, or makes a weird face at me. I mean I don't really acknowledge him that much or if at all since he does this stuff. But I have noticed that he has a new bromance. I see he has moved on from guys or color to guys of white. Hahha. I think I shall say that from now on. (People of white) Anyways, I find it very hilarious that he attached himself to these guys. I wonder when a girl will come along and break them up....it's only a matter of time. And then he will have found a new male friend.

"May you live in interesting times." -The Chinese Curse

Man it's good to be someone

Today was a very interesting day.

I mean first of all I was almost bored to tears in English where what's her face (I shall not name any names) was again being a bitch and acting like she can teach the class better then the actual professor. I mean the teacher is a bit....but still. She should know better not to talk down to a teacher.

Zoology was fine today and I saw profile guy again. Oh he's just so cute. =] And Athavi drew me some really nice drawings today. It really made everything great until Fernanda (girl one, not my house fellow Fernando who Tia thinks is super cute. He's not bad on the eyes if I do say so myself.) told me that we have a quiz on friday. Apparently we're going to be having a quiz every friday from now on. And that just reminded me more of the fact that I have to meet with my tutor for the first time on Friday. Oh gosh. I won't survive. I wonder if he's cute. hmm..I think that might be a bad thing. but you know.

Oh and I had my people interview today. I was super nervous for it but I think it went well. It wasn't too nerve-wracking like I thought it would be. But you know it's still an interview. And Lenard was there interview me and other people. (He's a cutie too) and I saw J-Furr come in just as I was about donw. I hope hers went well too. Tia's nervous about hers. She'll do great! We all will!

Oh and I watched the Season finale of white collar last night. AMAZING SHOW!! And Matt Bomer who play Neal Caffrey is friggin sexy as heck! OW OW!! I heard he's gay but I shouldn't really be a part of the rumor mill. So yeah don't think anything of it. I DIDN'T SAY ANY OF THIS!! Alright now that that's settled.

I have this amazing song stuck in my head. It's called Someday by Rob Thomas. It's AMAZING!! (I find myself saying that a lot). So listen to it. it's great!

"You can go. You can start all over again. You can try to find a way to make another day go by."

New Love or infatuation

So I'm sitting here at my desk not really doing anything. But I glanced over and saw the flier from the 100 Monkeys concert that me and the peeps went to last Thursday (disclaimer: THE BEST NIGHT EVER) and I have come to the conclusion...

MOHAWKS ARE SUPER SEXY!!! Especially on Jared. He is just a sight to see. OW OW! And I got his autograph not to mention a picture where he actually touched my shoulder!

I am a very happy person right now. =]

I like to multi task

I eavesdrop and people watch at the same time. It's a very fun past time of mine. I've discovered it more in college since there are so many people here. People find it strange but I think it's extremly funny. People are insane. Even Johnny Depp says so, so it must be true.

So today in discussion for Zoology 151, which by the way I don't even know why I'm in that class to begin with. It's so friggin annoying but according to my AAP advisor, I can do. Which in my opinion is so wrongfully wrong, it's just sick. But what can you do. But I guess on the plus side I'm getting a tutor for that class since you know I bombed for first exam. Big surprise there. But you know what? I had requested a tutor to my advisor a month ago and I just got one now. I wonder what would have happened if I had gotten I tutor before this bitch-tastic exam. But apparently according to my advisor and Katherine Friend (I wonder if she is actually friendly. I have never actually met said person, all I know is that I get a lot of emails from her and she has my first name so she must be awesome) my paper work was "misplaced". Oh yeah right, for a month? I don't think so. I just think my advisor hates me.

Anyways back to the point. I was in discussion and I was not going the assignment that we were supposed to be doing. But what are you gonna do when the teacher hands you a work sheet and then just sits back and watches everyone do it. It's a 50 minute class and I ended up leaving a while later and I was kicking myself for not having left 45 minutes before. But while I was there, I listened to the people around me and they were having a very interesting conversation about hitting deer with their cars. One kid whose name I don't know said something about actually slapping a deer. I mean who does that? I don't really know if I believe him but you know it was a good laugh. And then another girl started talking about a deer hitting her car (I think the only reason she started talking was to be a part of this conversation) and her story sounded a lot like what happened to Rory Gilmore in Gilmore Girls when she was hit by a deer. A little suspicious? I think so. But then again she was surrounded by guys so they would have no idea that that show even existed with the exception of my brother who always says when that theme song comes on "Aw, how gay."

Oh and the other day Tia and I were having a conversation about hands and pockets. I thought that is was very tragic to think about not having pockets. Personally I love pockets. But on my way to Zoology lecture (really, I mean really?) I saw this guy swinging his arms so flambouyantly I laughed out loud. I don't think anyone heard me but it really made my day. I should really tell Tia about that.

"I think everybody is NUTS, to tell you the truth. I think everybody is ABSOLUTELY OUT OF THEIR HEADS all the time. Watch people sometimes, just watch people. People are ABSOLUTELY INSANE! They just are. Look at us!" - Johnny Depp
(I have really taken this quote to heart)