So since graduating I've been doing what ever oyther graduate is doing. Applying for jobs.
I've applied for a bunch of internships at publishing companies in New York and I'm just spending my time now waiting to hear back. This is the worst part I think. Waiting.
The more I think about being out in New York and in the publishing atmosphere, the more excited I get. I just want to get up and get my life started.
I did it! I graduated!! It still feels pretty surreal. Maybe come September it will really hit me when I don't actually have to go back for class but for now I am officially a University of Wisconsin-Madison Alum.
I am totally going to congratulate myself and say "On Wisconsin!"
When I was in the third grade I thought that I was gay
'Cause I could draw, my uncle was, and I kept my room straight
I told my mom tears rushing down my face
She's like "Ben you've loved girls since before pre-k tripping, "
Yeah, I guess she had a point, didn't she?
Bunch of stereotypes all in my head.
I remember doing the math like, "Yeah, I'm good at little league"
A preconceived idea of what it all meant
For those that liked the same sex
Had the characteristics
The right wing conservatives think it's a decision
And you can be cured with some treatment and religion
Man-made rewiring of a predisposition
Playing God, aw nah here we go
America the brave still fears what we don't know
And God loves all his children, is somehow forgotten
But we paraphrase a book written thirty-five-hundred years ago
I don't know
And I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
I can't change
Even if I try
Even if I wanted to
My love
My love
My love
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
If I was gay, I would think hip-hop hates me
Have you read the YouTube comments lately?
"Man, that's gay" gets dropped on the daily
We become so numb to what we're saying
A culture founded from oppression
Yet we don't have acceptance for 'em
Call each other faggots behind the keys of a message board
A word rooted in hate, yet our genre still ignores it
Gay is synonymous with the lesser
It's the same hate that's caused wars from religion
Gender to skin color, the complexion of your pigment
The same fight that led people to walk outs and sit ins
It's human rights for everybody, there is no difference!
Live on and be yourself
When I was at church they taught me something else
If you preach hate at the service those words aren't anointed
That holy water that you soak in has been poisoned
When everyone else is more comfortable remaining voiceless
Rather than fighting for humans that have had their rights stolen
I might not be the same, but that's not important
No freedom till we're equal, damn right I support it
(I don't know)
And I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
My love
My love
My love
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
We press play, don't press pause
Progress, march on
With the veil over our eyes
We turn our back on the cause
Till the day that my uncles can be united by law
When kids are walking 'round the hallway plagued by pain in their heart
A world so hateful some would rather die than be who they are
And a certificate on paper isn't gonna solve it all
But it's a damn good place to start
No law is gonna change us
We have to change us
Whatever God you believe in
We come from the same one
Strip away the fear
Underneath it's all the same love
About time that we raised up
And I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
I can't change
Even if I try
Even if I wanted to
My love
My love
My love
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
Love is patient
Love is kind
Love is patient
Love is kind
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is patient
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is kind
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is patient
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is kind
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is patient
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is kind
(I'm not crying on Sundays)
Love is patient
Love is kind
My bestest friend on this earth showed me this today (she found it on pinterest but it is clearly a tumblr post) and there is no possible way on earth that I could not document this for all eternity and so that's why I'm here.
This is: If Tom Hiddleston were a Rapper. (Or should I say Tommy Hiddles? Yes, no? Okay, no. I shouldn't try and come up with rapper names. Lolz.)
As I was walking out of my last class today, last class of the semester, last class of my college career, it hit me.
I will no longer be an undergrad. I will no longer get to walk this campus as a college student with bright ideas and possibilities about the future. The future is here and it literally just slapped me in the face and it's gonna leave a bruise. A nice, shiny, purple reminder of my last 4 years here and how much I have learned, experienced, enjoyed and hated.
I will miss so much about college. I will miss so much about this campus. I will miss going to class. I will miss meeting new people. I will miss doing things I had never thought I would get the chance to do. I will miss all of the discoveries that I've made about myself but I will always be able to take those with me. College has changed me in so many ways that I don't have enough fingers and toes to count them all. I'm so glad that I got the chance to be here. Had the opportunity and the privilege to attend this great school. I will miss it here.
I guess my dad was right. These past few years have been the best years of my life.
What is it about those eyes
That take me towards the brink of death?
They are imprinted on my eye lids
Bringing light into the darkening abyss
And yet
They are no where within my grasp
They are practically untouchable
Unknowable even
Beware of sea foam green
It could just be the very last thing you ever see
