Stress

You know the saying that there's good stress and bad stress?

Well I think that's just dumb. Why on earth would there be any stress that's good?
Example: You see someone cheezin' ear to ear and skipping around like a maniac. Your first reaction is "WTF?" but then once you get over the initial shock of the incident you go up to them and ask "Are you alright?" And then this person runs up to, is all up in yo' grill and shouts "I'm stressed!" and then goes along on their merry way.

Yeah that NEVER happens! I have no idea how stress can be good....I mean I guess I do....but I never feel like stress is good. Usually a person who is stressed has SO MUCH to do that they are actually in the process of RIPPING THEIR HAIR OUT!!! Or maybe yelling at INANIMATE OBJECTS to relieve such stress. I don't find any of these things healthy to say the least.

This much has to be said: I AM STRESSED!!!

Nostalgia

"Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson. You find the present tense and the past perfect."

I for some reason am feeling very nostalgic at the moment. I just want to be young again. There is nothing like the past that can make you feel gloomy about the present. Everything was simple when I was younger. All I did was watch some the greatest TV shows in the world (which may have something to do with why I'm feeling this way), play outside for hours, never wanting to come inside, having the summer to just do what ever a little kid does, spend time with your parents when it was the most exciting thing to do. I wonder why being a little kid was simple but being an adult is so complicated. I just don't understand it. Why are there so many things that need to be done? It seems like it never ends. When you're a child all you do is think about what's happening right at that moment whether it's playing in the mud, or climbing that tree, or playing with the dog, or getting to go over to a friend's house. Nowadays all you think about is the work you have to do today, the next day, the day after that, and the day after that. There no longer seems to be anytime for fun. Even when you do get the chance to just hangout with people, there is still that moment in between that you're thinking I should be doing work instead of being here. Or afterwards when you're thinking that was a lot of fun, but now I have all of this work to do.

I want things to be simple again. I don't know how to do that though. I know there is no way that things will be as simple as they were when I was younger. All it is going to get is harder. More complicated. There is only room to grow but there isn't any room for the uncomplicated, the simple.

There however is one thing that is simple: I miss my childhood.

A Pensieve

Nothing is more magical than the world of Harry Potter. But what I find the most magical, or I guess fascinating is the pensieve. It can replay all of your memories for you and you can be there first hand to witness yourself witnessing an event in your life as it originally took place.

I would love to be able to look back on my memories. Not to change any of them but just to reflect on them with a more accurate assessment. I would really love to be able to see myself when I was a child. That was one of the best times of my life and I recall having so much fun. I would love to have the chance to witness myself experiencing a much simpler time. Which is what it is when you're a little kid. Absolutely no care in the world and the only thing that matters is to have fun. I wish I could think that way now but there are too many things that get in the way. I desperately want to take a vacation from myself and go back to when I was happiest.

If even for a moment...

Thinking takes thought...

I know I shouldn't have to justify my actions or thoughts to others. But should I have to justify them to myself? If I can't figure out my motives for doing something then why am I even doing it? There has to be some kind of reasoning for it. Maybe it's just deep in the back of my mind and I am unwilling to admit the reasons why I do things. Or maybe it's right in front of me but I just can't see it. More like unwilling to see it. I feel like I should know the way my own mind works, or maybe this is a case in which I need to discover the way my subconscious works. But then again how many people can say that they are able to justify things that are in their subconscious? See, I don't know either. I think the things I do and the reasoning behind them are right on the tip of my tongue but I just don't want to taste them or actually have them go down my throat and have to digest them. I don't think I would want to have to digest something I don't have to. But what am I digesting? My own thoughts? The thoughts of others? What other people think of me? What I think of myself? I honestly don't know. It all comes back to question of why we do things. Are we doing them for the benefit of ourselves or for others? Again, I don't know.

So why do we do the things we do? That is the question that goes unanswered. Too bad this is the one answer I'm really looking for.

True Greatness

"No true fiasco ever began as a quest for mere adequacy. The motto of the British Special Air Force is: "Those who risk, win." A single vine shoot is able to grow through cement. The Pacific Northwestern Salmon beats itself bloody on its quest to travel hundreds of miles upstream against the current, with a single purpose, sex of course, but also...life."

Today = Life

I have the tendency to look ahead into the future. There is really nothing wrong with that but I seem to look at the future in a negative light. I think if I'm gonna looking forward to the future I should be doing just that...looking forward to it. But then again at the same time when I look towards the future I tend to forget what's happening today; what's happening right now. The most important thing is the present. If I forget that then what am I even doing? If I don't enjoy what I'm doing today how am I ever going to enjoy tomorrow?

All I have to say is this: You have no idea what's going to happen tomorrow, so enjoy today. Have fun!